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Ataraxy

by Depthbuffer

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Iker GS
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Iker GS I discovered this album by word of mouth and I believe it'll get cult status eventually .
I'm not too inclined to listen to synth-pop but this is just too good to be ignored. A unique work of sheer musicianship.
Tichounko
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Tichounko Woke up in the middle of the night, checked my email with the hope for a notification about this album due to be released today and voilà…!

Now it’s 4:20 and I’ve played it for the first time. What a wonderful, brilliant album it is! I’ve always loved and valued albums that work as stories more than random sets of tracks and this is a hell of a story album!

It’s dope to have something new that great to listen to many, many times in the present and the future. Hats off Phil! Favorite track: It Says.
FoxPuppy
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FoxPuppy I love this album. DB's ability to defy description makes it hard to write these, but the quality of his work makes it fun to try! Some tracks have such creative use of samples. Others, the expressive vocal stylings of DB himself. I really enjoyed listening to Ataraxy and the variety and layers of the music are going to have me listening again and again.
Rubix 'Ruby' Kitten
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Rubix 'Ruby' Kitten A gem of absolute brilliant catharsis. Perfect for weather of any kind both inside and out. Really brings back that vibe of healing solitude through processing the complexity of pain Favorite track: Sixpence to Bury the Dead.
Alpha Chrome Yayo
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Alpha Chrome Yayo Listen, I love writing Bandcamp reviews, I think it's a lovely thing to do and it makes me feel nice. But sometimes I feel like doing so makes an album 'about me' somehow and I want to be very careful not to do that here.

Because this record is INCREDIBLE. It's one of the best things I've heard on Bandcamp, or anywhere. Ever. A shining example of... shit, I don't even know... pure joy? Musicianship? Perfection?

I love this and I promise you will too. That's all you need to hear from me. Favorite track: Fell in Love with a JPEG.
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1.
It Says 05:54
It keeps you locked in the basement Won't let you go outside You haven't seen the sun for days It says it hurts your eyes Heart pounds in time with the pavement You can't forget You get halfway and you turn around Smothered in regret It says; it says; it says it loves you It says; it says; it says it cares It says; it says; it will protect you It says; it says; don't go, don't dare It says that they only pity you You're better off alone It says that you'll only let them down So don't get close Conversations one-sided They ask what's wrong Head full of words but it hurts to speak Long after they're gone Familiar voices behind the door Feel the bile rise Hand on the handle but you can't turn Can't face their prying eyes It says you don't have a place here This world's not yours Eyes down, mouth shut, they'll give up in time You'll be safe when they're gone It says; it says; it says it loves you It says; it says; it says it cares It says; it says; it will protect you It says; it says; don't go, don't dare [One layer from each verse simultaneously]
2.
Wednesday's child full of sorrow Mother stepped over rope Peridot stone for protection Hamatiel's blessing for troth Steel key in the cradle Keep the black dwarves at bay Breathe on the infant when baptized Cast the devil away Dew from fresh graves in the churchyard in May at sunrise Heal the child's ailments and they will be bonny and wise Sixpence to bury the dead Sixpence to bury the dead Children sing ring a roses All fall down as they play Pleasant scents to protect you Keep the bad air away Tales of wolves that will eat you If into the forest you stray Hags that ride you at nighttime Fairies take you away And the blackbirds baked in the pie start to sing A dainty dish, surely fit for a king Sixpence to bury the dead Sixpence to bury the dead Dress in nine things of nine colours As a cure for the ague Tie your garters round gallows As a ward against plague Breathe the breath of the white mare Cut the ear of a goat Eat a breakfast of spiderwebs Purge the cough from your throat Drive a nail through the soil at the crossroads, turn three times around To the next passer by all your fevers shall ever be bound Sixpence to bury the dead Sixpence to bury the dead Throw salt over your shoulder Lest Old Scratch goad you on Don't walk under that ladder 'Twixt spirit, and father, and son See yourself in a coffin-lid You will join the deceased Touch the toe of the dead man And your spirit be eased The ferryman stood by the riverside holds out his hand Takes the coins from your eyes as his price for departing this land Sixpence to bury the dead Sixpence to bury the dead
3.
The eye and the brain The aqueous humor The choroid, the sclera, the crystalline lens The vitreous humor The iris, the pupil This complicated arrangement of rods and cones Nature has provided ample protection for these very delicate organs The skull, the bony walls, the fatty tissue, and the bony orbit The facts presented here are not generally known, And have only recently been accepted by science Let us realise that light rays, Reflected from any object, Radiate knowledge in all directions Right now, at this very moment, Tiny beams of magnified knowledge, Entering your own eyes, Provide nourishment to the tissues of the brain This causes a response, or reflex, within our brain Which brings about Harmonious internal adjustments Of all parts of the science of today It is necessary that both our eyes Be fixed upon the same point In order that we may see science clearly When an object has reached a distance Of 15 feet or more, The rays entering our eyes Are practically parallel But if a distant object approaches the eye, The angle between the entering rays Again grows larger The soft, pliable body of the lens Must take on different degrees of convexity To form a sharply-focused image With marvellous speed and accuracy The eye and the brain The aqueous humor The choroid, the sclera, the crystalline lens The vitreous humor The iris, the pupil This complicated arrangement of rods and cones The eye and the brain The aqueous humor The choroid, the sclera, the crystalline lens The vitreous humor The iris, the pupil This complicated arrangement of rods and cones The eye and the brain Now compare this with the focal adjustment of a camera Here the lens remains unchanged, But the film itself is moved Until it reaches a sharp focal image A camera cannot see science The brain can expand and contract to contain knowledge Liquids cannot be compressed When a sudden jolt of liquid knowledge Enters into the nose, it is Confined within the rigid capsule of the skull And must therefore exert pressure upon the brain The tear gland, Which secretes the tear fluid, Through the tear ducts, Into the nose, Protects the brain against liquid knowledge Knowledge must only pass into the brain as light; Thus it is molded by the lens Into an even curve against the retina, Which science has called One of the main features of the eye mechanism The eye and the brain The aqueous humor The choroid, the sclera, the crystalline lens The vitreous humor The iris, the pupil This complicated arrangement of rods and cones The eye and the brain It is well for us to know That our eyes are one of our greatest gifts of nature And are indeed worthy Of our constant care and protection
4.
Monsters 04:37
Came home late from school one day Tears in your eyes you wouldn't tell me why Teacher said you're a quiet child With a brilliant future if you'd only try Your mother and me, we didn't get along Damaged people getting worse each day It wasn't your fault, you did nothing wrong Broke my heart to see you move away Close your eyes and hug me closer I'll protect you from all the monsters Under your bed You tried to tell them what you could see In the wee small hours when you couldn't sleep They laughed and teased and called you names Even your best friend said that you're a creep I didn't leave the house for days Couldn't face the outside world alone When you said I miss you dad I died inside, thought I could not go on Close your eyes and hug me closer I'll protect you from all the monsters Under your bed Their slimy hands, their staring eyes Scaly skin and crooked smiles Hide in shadows til you dream Make nightmares out of everything Plant wicked thoughts like rotten seeds Dwell on all my darkest deeds Pull me down into the night For you I won't give up the fight Close your eyes and hug me closer Please protect me from all the monsters Under my bed In trying to make up for lost time I was pushing you away You say that you know what I did Where do you think you heard those tales The misplaced wisdom of the young You're tired of walking on eggshells I never asked you to hold back Never told you not to be yourself
5.
Please Hold 02:53
Please hold Please hold me You are number 546 in the queue You are number 1 in my heart Your call is important Your call is everything to me Please hold Hold me close Hold me tight Tighter Closer Hold me like one of your French phones Please hold Please hold me Please me Press 1 for the main menu Press 2 for my secret menu All our operators are currently occupied All my thoughts are currently preoccupied Please hold Please hold me
6.
(Drum noises!) (You're in the wrong octave, chungus) I'm in love with a JPEG I think I like her face but it's so compressed I'm in love with a JPEG Took a minute to download at 56k I'm in love with a JPEG I found her one day while browsing Geocities I'm in love with a JPEG It was love at first sight, although the quality's shitty Got a long-distance lover Stayed up all night on ICQ Wish I could see her in motion I'll buy a cam, get her one too Says she lives in Alaska Gonna meet her IRL one day She'll come over to visit If I just send her the money to pay (Ooh) Doot-doot-doo-dah, Doot doot doo-doo Doo doop doot dah dooooo Doot-doot-doo-dah, Doot doot doo-doo Dooh dah doodle-doodle-dah dooooo I keep her on my hard drive In a folder I hope my mum doesn't find I'd take her out more often But I'm worried I might go blind (Ooh) (Dude, you sure you wanna put that in?) (It'll be fine) (More cowbell!) [Repeat to taste] My 256k girlfriend Wish I could be her real friend Her blocky curves, her colour bands I love her through these artefacts [Bonus internet] A proud member of the indie musician webring. Sign my guestbook. Best viewed with open eyes. Under Construction. All praise the hamster dance. You're the man now, dog. Requires Shockwave Flash. Badger, mushroom, snake. HotBot, the WIRED search center. Excite Search: twice the power of the competition. Lycos: it's amazing where Go Get It will get you. AltaVista: view multimedia from our vantage point. Dogpile, Aliweb, Reference.com, MetaCrawler, What-U-Seek, Ask Jeeves, Search.com. Google was originally called BackRub. Angelfire still exists. YouTube started as a dating website advertised on Craigslist. Its first ever video would take over 313 microfortnights to download on a 28k modem. They have really really really long, uh, trunks. Rule 34. I was once nearly expelled for nuking all the Windows 95 PCs at school. Stay safe out there on the information superhighway.
7.
Daddy, did you have peas like this when you were little? Yes, Lynn, we had peas that tasted just like these. I used to go out in the garden, and pick them fresh for dinner. Daddy, how do peas grow? You really wanna know? Uh huh! Well, I'll tell ya. After dinner, we'll get the big wonder book, And I'll tell you the whole story. You know, when I was a boy, we had a small vegetable garden Not far from the kitchen door. When peas were in season, mother used to send me out pick them. She and your Aunt Carrie used to shell them by hand. But nowadays, think how much easier it is. Why, we can have fresh peas any day of the year! [Scratching] Daddy, how do peas grow? You really wanna know? Uh-huh. Well, I'll tell ya. The pea fields of the Midwest. Heart of America's great pea-growing region. In the towns that dot the countryside, Breathes a social and economic life That hinges on the harvest and canning of vegetables For the Market Baskets of the World. For when the pods are well-filled, And the harvest heavy, There is work for everyone And community prosperity. Harvested just at the instant Nature says ready, When the vines are covered with dew, And the pods are crisp and snappy, When the peas are at their peak, That's when the mower goes to town. One hour too early or too late, And that prime quality may be lost forever. It's a race of men and machines against time! Lending every scientific aid to develop The finest peas that can be grown. For it's in the field, And in the field alone, That quality is made. The wagon train lumbers across the field To the vining station For the next chapter Of pea progress This is just a sort of warmer-upper - Those peas ain't seen nothin' yet! Comes now the final ordeal. It's every pea for himself, And only the fit survive. These two young fellows are weak and watery. These overgrown ones, hard and starchy, their flavour gone, Out you go! [Scratching] Daddy, how do peas grow? [Scratching] Daddy, how do they get in the can? It's the last lap now, and those tender peas, Like a June morning peeking at you through a window, Are lined up at attention Awaiting their turn at the filling machine. Canning is a fast-tempoed climax, That happens faster than a firm whack With a flat paddle. By now, every one of those ambitious young peas Knows it's been places And no mistake about it! It can throw out its chest, and say: I am a world champion! The best that nature, science, Men, and machines combined, Can produce! Uniform in colour, Uniformly tender; The finest flavour every captured From a garden On a dewy June morning. The Pick of the Pod.
8.
I used to walk in the rain With my invisible friend I never saw them again Were they just in my head? A bump in the night A bright flash of light Are you feeling alright? Yeah, everything's fine That feeling again That fog on the brain My ears start to ring As the room slowly spins Out like a light Wake up feeling tired Count electric sheep Is this really me? And there's no release From this nameless disease This sense of unease And I can't decide Is it all in my mind Seen by gaslight? SSRI SNRI NASSA SARI TCA MAOI CBT DBT ACT IPT MBCT EMDR It's 3 a.m. It's raining again I turn to my friend And take them by the hand

about

Come with me, dear listener,
On a journey most strange;
Where your mind leaves behind
All the things it can't change.

Innocent tales
Of peas, pies, and eyes;
Or of disinformation,
Persuasion, and lies?

In these magicks and mantras,
No cure to be had;
But pills that don't help
Can be equally bad.

There are monsters without,
And monsters within;
And the cages we build
To keep them all in.

So come with me, listener,
And maybe, just maybe,
We'll leave it behind
And attain Ataraxy.

credits

released April 23, 2022

All me.

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Depthbuffer London, UK

Producing an eclectic mix of electronic music from a tiny room in London, England. His output ranges from one-off, quirky singles spawned from a single idea, to slightly more "serious" in-depth work, with a wide range of influences and no single discernible subgenre throughout. ... more

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